We live in a society of movement. We strive to constantly be active and moving. We strive for good grades by doing extra work. We try to gather friends by doing more activities. We try to find better jobs by padding our resumes with more and better activities. We even count our steps in hopes of improving our health. Even if we are not physically moving, we are always striving and working for more than we have.
Now this is a great quality. Those of us who move more are able to gain more and are better off for it. As a society we reward the people who try the most with movement. People who work harder get better grades and move further and life for their work ethic. Yet, after the breath workshop I had to ask myself, "is this always for the best?"
For example, after class all I wanted to do was go home and not move. I didn't want to move my muscles, or stimulate my senses, or even think about anything. I simply wanted to lie still and to allow stillness to consume me. Yet I knew I couldn't do this because I had a lab to finish.
I think that as wonderful as the drive to be greater is, it also poses a hindrance. People are so enamored with greatness that we neglect anything that doesn't directly help us in achieving our goals. People forget to breath.
After all of this being said however, I can honestly say that if given a second chance of choosing to do my lab or not, I wouldn't alter my decision. I can recognize the problem but I don't know how to fix it. Over the last couple days I've pondered a lot over this conundrum, and as of yet I still have no answer.
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The conundrum you pose is something that I fantasized only affected me. How selfish, haha! I desire so strongly to be legendary. To impact the world in fantastical ways, for the benefit of all...or most. When I die, I want the world to mourn the loss of a tremendous man who devoted his life to truly enabling the success and happiness of millions.
ReplyDeleteBut, I also want to sleep. I want to ditch my homework and go for a walk. I want to have the ability to lay in the grass at 7:32 pm on a Wednesday night, while breathing deeply and taking in the energy that the stars have to offer without the consequences that follow from missing class. Periodically, I desperately want to abandon all of my responsibilities and sit outside while being absorbed in a good book. I strongly desire a state of rest.
At times, these two desires seem to contradict each other, but they do not. In my case, it is not two separate people that desire these things, but one. The way I go about "solving" this conundrum on a daily basis is by listening to my desires at any given moment. By making a conscious decision to not let society's expectations dictate my actions, I feel that I have solved the conundrum on a micro scale. Each of us has desires; some of them are temporary (i.e. relaxing instead of writing THIS lab report) and some of them are more permanent (i.e. wanting to develop the skills necessary to be a valuable employee or business owner and thus writing THIS lab report) and all of these desires are either reactants or products of how our realities will turn out. At the end of the day though, it is our desires and our desires alone which dictate whether we will be productive busy bees, or less productive, care-free sloths today. When we realize that the choice is ours, I think it becomes less of a conundrum, and more of a conscious decision to act on our desires one day at a time.
Thanks for posting this Meghan, you certainly are not alone in this. I recently made a realization that it had been at least 6 months since I hadn't left the house for a day. If you asked me to describe a perfect day, one of my many versions would be sitting around the house listening to music, cooking, and not doing anything remotely productive. Yet I've found I go long stretches of time without doing anything remotely close to this. Because who would notice. Who benefits when I sit around the house and do nothing? If I go to school if I'm working on my future. If I go to work I'm helping clients. If I go to extra curriculars I'm helping my community. But is there anything more seemingly indulgent than taking an entire day for ourselves? In myself I see a complete over correction from my time in high school, where I had way too much free time, was constantly bored, and was as unproductive as possible. Jump forward to college and I find myself pushed too hard to maintain all of my commitments. Like most things in life, sanity is found in moderation. At this school, if anyone falls out of balance it is almost never favoring the side of laziness and relaxation, so I would not hesitate to take a day off. I know I'll be back at it tomorrow. Hopefully Jordan comments on this, as he always has thoughts on this subject.
ReplyDeleteMeghan, I too struggle with this dilemma. My friends make fun of me for it, but I have the sleeping habits of a toddler. I can sleep ten hours a night easily. No problem. And if my class and work schedule allowed it, I would take a nap every single day. I am my best person when I am well rested. But at this school, it is not only difficult to prioritize rest due to our various commitments, but it is often devalued by those around us. Fortunately, it was another McBride class that led me to see the value in prioritizing rest. In the SAD class from Fall of 2016, we read a book called The Noonday Demon. In this book, the author chronicles his never-ending battle with severe depression. Depression so debilitating that he couldn’t shower, sleep, or eat. It was an extremely emotionally draining read, and is a condition I would never wish on anyone. Fortunately, the author has for the past few years been in a cycle of lessened depression, thus allowing him to write this book. In one of the chapters, he talked about ways in which he keeps his mental health at its best. For him, that means 9 hours of sleep at night, no exceptions. Rest is so very important for your overall health. Whether rest for you is a couple extra hours of sleep, some trashy TV, or a glass of wine with friends – find it, prioritize it, and don’t apologize for taking care of yourself.
ReplyDeleteI think this is a really interesting way of looking at society, specifically American society. It's funny that you frame this in movement, because I was just talking with my mom about how sedentary I've become in college. It's kind of like a hurry up and wait scenario. Yes, I walk to school, but then I sit still for an hour, then repeat until I get to walk home. Then I sit and do homework, only getting up to pee or make dinner. Then I sit back down until I shower or lay down to sleep. I think in some ways, we're thinking of movement a little differently, because I also totally agree with your viewpoint and have similar issues myself.
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