Given
today’s social and political climate, I would say we are struggling with our
emotional intelligence. We struggle to see from other perspectives, especially
on issues we care about, for a number of reasons. Maybe we know that the other
perspectives are wrong, stupid even. Maybe they don’t know what they’re talking
about and that if they had done their research they would finally see that you’re
right. Maybe we just flat out don’t care enough to do so. We surround ourselves
with people that agree with ourselves, which is just fine. We say we would give
the other side room to present their argument, but in reality we’re just going
to ignore and ridicule them. I see this from myself often enough whenever a
certain political figure uses social media. So is it a lack of emotional
intelligence? Is there any to begin with?
I,
personally, find it hard to empathize with people that support a certain
political party. It sounds ignorant but it’s true. Do I really care to hear
about what they say? No. Why should I? They’re ignorant and so far removed from
reality that there’s no point in acknowledging them. Do they listen to me when
I make my points? No. We’re finally equal and no one has changed.
When
we talked about emotional intelligence, we discussed its power through art and
literature, how we can see ourselves in similar situations, how we can feel the
same feelings as the artist or author did. Emotional intelligence is something
that, I think, pushes boundaries and expands horizons in finding yourself in
somebody else. During the election, I was afraid, as was half of the country.
That phrasing, though, should change if we are to employ emotional
intelligence. Right? The whole country was afraid, afraid that the other
candidate would change everything for the worse. Now that one has won, the
other half no longer validates their feelings. I am certainly guilty of it. But
how can I say that I keep an open mind and value all perspectives when I really
don’t. I don’t want to see myself in any of them, I don’t want to agree with
any aspect of their positions. Sure we can talk about it but in the end I still
won’t agree. It all seems rather pointless.
So,
I guess, my question is, how can we promote or use emotional intelligence in
way that is productive and progressive?
I think that when we think of emotional intelligence, we focus too much on the outer world. Granted, it is definitely an outer world tool, one we should use to better understand other's perspectives, especially those that are drastically different than our own. However, I do not think that this is the sole purpose of this tool. David Bohm was able to use emotional intelligence in a way that helped him better understand his work and individual beliefs literally while being persecuted for those beliefs. I think that this is one way we can use the tool progressively. Rather than attempting to empathize with statements and opinions which are outside of our own, we can attempt to better understand why we think the way we do. Why is it so hard for us to accept or even listen to the opposing arguments? This inner dialogue, I think, is an important emotional intelligence facet as well.
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